I wander if you could add a long list of steps that need to be done, so that all the does it build and work stuff is covered?

Not an answer to your question, but I have .biz domains cuz they are cheap. Also OVH have a .ovh that was about £1

I use OVH for all things DNS, TIL: they have a dynhost thing that will do all the DNS updating for you!

https://help.ovhcloud.com/csm/en-gb-dns-dynhost?id=kb_article_view&sysparm_article=KB0051640

I have been using beeper for a while now and its amazing, signal, teleagram, whatsapp and others all in a single app. Both mobile and desktop.

Also, you could self host all the bits if you want

I migrated out of keypass and into vaultwarden, not looked back since.

Also if someone gets into your password manager then they have all the keys to everything

it was more for anyone who doesnt know LDAP

LDAP is the Linux equivalent of a window domain controller, but it can be used by a wide variety of other systems as authentication and authorisation.

Linux it’s self can use it too

Keycloak is amazing for no money, I use it connected to my Google workspace.

Just an FYI: OVH have anti DDoS builtin to their VPS and dedi servers, so I dont use CloudFlare. Never have, I run all my services (except DoS mistigations) my self.

So your looking for a file share not a notification system, that’s the big difference.

Notifications don’t tend to have massive file attachments

For a giggle, what about home assistant?

The software is free, but no dev works for free.

Thay have a company that pays for dev time, that company will need funds.

Might get some socks for work

I know your looking for self hosted, but I can recommend pushover. It’s got a lot and the apps are amazing, for $5 for a life time license it’s great.

I wander if matrix will jump in use as discord now needs age verification?

you could look at wifi/zigbee buttons, Shelly have wifi buttons.

I think your running it wrong if you have that many issues, but I would say Nextcloud is a big system and setup can be hard to get right.

If you need help I run nextcloud fine and could point you at things to check

a lot of that can be done with nextcloud, there a apps that cover all sorts of thing.

I dont have a business so cant comment more

What about small step sash ca?

I’ve been using it to secure all my stuff for over a year, no more copying keys about

I think you miss understand, if ha has the broker and a mesh node. Then your node could just send a message home and your home node would post the message to mqtt